Useful To God

Introduction

Christian manhood is inseparable from discipleship. Any attempt to define what it means to be a "Christian man" apart from following Christ results in a distorted vision, shaped more by culture than by biblical truth. To be a Christian man is to be united with Christ through faith, actively learning to live under His authority and reflecting His character in all aspects of life. This process requires continual growth, transformation, and submission to God's will, shaping not only personal behavior but also the way men interact within their communities, families, and workplaces.

Often, cultural ideals of masculinity emphasized bravado, dominance, or self-sufficiency—qualities that do not emerge from biblical discipleship. Instead, Scripture presents an alternative vision, one marked by gentleness (Eph 4:2; 1 Thess 2:7; 1 Tim 6:11), meekness (Matt 5:5; 2Cor 10:1; Col 3:12), and compassion (Col 3:12). A Christian man does not strive to conform to cultural stereotypes of masculinity but rather to the image ofChrist. He pursues humility and servanthood, recognizing that true strength is demonstrated through sacrificial love rather than dominance.

At the same time, the biblical distinction between male and female must not be ignored. While men and women share the same fundamental identity as image-bearers of God, they remain distinct. Genesis1:27 affirms this distinction: "Male and female He created them."Recognizing and maintaining this distinction is essential, but we must also guard against overstatement, ensuring that our definitions of masculinity and femininity align with biblical rather than cultural standards. Men and women have distinct yet complementary roles in God’s design, which is ultimately rooted in mutual submission to Christ.

Key Considerations forChristian Manhood

Jesus Is the Ideal Human, Not Just the Ideal Man
Christian men, like all disciples, are called to learn from Jesus, but not because He was male. Rather, they follow Him because He is the perfect example of humanity. The lessons men derive from Christ are not exclusive to their gender; they are rooted in the broader calling of Christian discipleship. When Both men and women imitate Christ, they grow into the fullness of theirGod-given identity without losing their distinctiveness as male or female. A Christian man models his character after Christ by leading with love, serving with humility, and pursuing righteousness in every aspect of life.

Manhood Is Embodied Differently in Different Contexts
While generalizations can be useful, they have limitations. For example, while men are generally stronger than women, there are many women who can out-lift most men in weight training. Physical strength, therefore, is not the defining trait of masculinity. Similarly, Christian men should be careful not to impose rigid, one-size-fits-all definitions of manhood. Instead, they should recognize that each man expresses his discipleship uniquely, shaped by his gifts, circumstances, and relationships. The measure of a man is not in his ability to dominate but in his commitment to love God and others faithfully.

Culture Conditions, but Christ Governs
Cultural expectations influence how masculinity is expressed, but they should never dictate what it means to be a Christian man. For instance, Deuteronomy 22:5 warns against blurring gender distinctions through clothing, but this must be understood within its cultural context. The command does not prohibit kilts for men or pantsuits for women but rather demands that the distinction between male and female be maintained. Similarly, Christian men must navigate cultural expectations of manhood while remaining rooted in Christ’s authority. Their Actions should reflect biblical values rather than societal pressures, prioritizing holiness over cultural conformity.

With these preliminary thoughts in mind, we can now consider what it means to be a Christian man.

Christian Manhood from Scripture

Does the Bible provide a single, definitive paradigm for Christian Manhood? Not necessarily. While Scripture portrays many male figures, it doesn't always specify which traits are universally applicable and which are uniquely male. For example, Paul urges both men and women in Philippi to imitate Christ (Phil 2:1-11), underscoring the universal nature of discipleship.Jesus is not just a model for men because he is male, but for everyone because he is the model human.

The Fact that Jesus is male isn’t trivial. It would likely have influenced the way he navigated his world. Being male would have had a variety of advantages and limitations. Jesus was not showing us how to be a Christian man specifically, but how to be human—how to live a life surrendered to God’s will. To illustrate the point, we don’t counsel women to imitate Christ selectively (e.g., leaving out the parts of Christ's Life that are only applicable to men) because we don’t believe that when women imitate Christ, they are in any danger of becoming less female.

That said, certain biblical qualifications for leadership are male-specific, such as the characteristics required of an overseer in 1 Timothy 3:1-7. However, most of these virtues—being above reproach, sober-minded, self-controlled, hospitable—are expected of all Christians, not just men. While men will embody these traits within their particular roles, the fundamental call to godliness transcends gender. Note the following:

“above reproach” (1 Tim 3:2)- See 1 Tim 5:7 (widows)
“sober-minded” (1 Tim 3:2)- See 1 Tim 3:11 (wives)
“self-controlled” (1 Tim 3:2)- See Tit 2:5 (young women)
“respectable” (1 Tim 3:2)- 1 Tim 2:9 (women; often translated “modesty”)
“hospitable” (1 Tim 3:2)- See 1 Peter 4:9 (whole community of faith)
“able to teach” (1 Tim 3:2)- This term is not applied to women though women are described or portrayed as teaching in other contexts (Tit 2:3)
“drunkard” (1 Tim 3:3)- Though this exact phrase is not applied to women, Titus 2:3 commands older women not to be “slaves to much wine.” We also see general prohibitions of drunkenness applied to the whole community (Eph 5:18).
“violent” (1 Tim 3:3)- This term is not applied to women.
“gentle” (1 Tim 3:3)- See Phil 4:5 and Tit 3:2 (whole community of faith); see also Jam 3:17 (characteristic of “wisdom from above”)
“not a brawler” (1 Tim 3:3)- See Titus 3:2 (whole community of faith)
“not a lover of money (1 Tim 3:3)- See Heb 13:5 (whole community of faith)

1 Timothy 3:3-7 does offer some male-specific characteristics.Managing one’s household, for example, is seen as a male-specific role though it is possible that Paul’s instructions regarding the management of one’s household is conditioned by the surrounding culture. Paul may have been trying to avoid a situation in which Christian men were viewed as being weak or out of control within a society in which men tended to be more domineering over their families as a means of preserving their reputations. The point is that men, whether by nature or by social conventions, will embody these characteristics in unique ways within their various relationships.

Men in Relation

Ephesians 5:15-6:9 offers instructions on wise Christian living, including guidance for men in various relational roles. Paulcalls husbands to love their wives sacrificially (Eph 5:25), fathers to raise their children with godly instruction (Eph 6:4), and masters to treat servants with dignity (Eph 6:9). Rather than dismantling social structures, Paul callsChristian men to transform them by submitting to Christ’s authority.

A Christian man does not define himself by societal success but by his faithfulness in his relationships. Whether as a husband, father, or leader, his primary responsibility is to reflect Christ’s character. As Augustine observed, many men seek to be loved and feared for their own sake rather thanGod’s. A Christian man, however, seeks only to glorify God in whatever role he occupies. He prioritizes integrity over influence, ensuring that his leadership is rooted in humility rather than ambition.

Christians to act differently within existing social structures.The instructions concerning wives/husbands (5:22-32), children/parents (6:1-4) and servants/masters (6:5-9) transform instead of eliminating social distinctions. There are still children and parents, servants and masters, and wives and husbands.

What does this mean for Christian men? It highlights that while culture influences how men express themselves in the world, it does not have ultimate authority over that expression. Men hold various roles within society, but the roles themselves aren’t necessarily the issue. Rather, the challenge often lies in how society interprets these roles and how it rewards those who occupy them. Augustine observed that certain positions in human society can tempt us to seek admiration and fear, not as a reflection of God’s glory, but as a substitute for it. For Christian men, stepping into roles—whether as husbands, fathers, professionals, artists, or leaders—means their identity is shaped by God, not dictated by worldly expectations.

Second, Scripture teaches that men and women were created as partners in God's work (Genesis 2:18-25). The Hebrew term ezer, often translated as “helper,” can be misleading if understood as implying subordination. However, the Bible frequently describes God Himself as an ezer (Exodus 18:4; Deuteronomy 33:7; Psalm 70:5), reinforcing that the term denotes strength and essential support rather than inferiority. A more accurate understanding is that woman was created as a co-laborer and co-warrior alongside man.

When Paul states in 1 Corinthians 11:8, “For man was not made from woman, but woman from man. Neither was man created for woman, but woman forman,” he is referencing the creation account. The phrase “for man” does not imply servitude but rather acknowledges that man alone was incomplete in fulfilling God’s purposes. Woman was designed to complement and complete man, filling the gaps in their shared divine mission.

Ultimately, a Christian man’s primary identity is defined by his relationship with Christ. In addressing masters and servants, Paul reminds masters—who were often men—that their treatment of those under their authority must reflect their shared accountability before God. Because the Lord judges impartially, they are called to act with dignity and fairness (Ephesians 6:9;Colossians 4:1). A man’s standing before God should guide and shape every relationship he enters, ensuring that his leadership and influence reflect the justice and love of Christ.

Conclusion

So, what defines a Christian man?A few key points stand out:

Christian manhood is a specialized form of discipleship. Men are called to follow Christ as men, embodying their faith in a way that reflects their God-given identity. Certain biblical instructions, such as the command for male overseers to be non-violent (1 Tim3:3; Tit 1:7), may reflect tendencies that require special attention in male discipleship.

Christian men navigate societal structures under Christ's Authority. They do not conform to cultural definitions of masculinity but instead seek to glorify God.Their ultimate allegiance is not to social expectations but to the Lord.

Christian men prioritize being Christian over being"manly." The call to"act like men" (1 Cor 16:13) is ultimately a call to discipleship.Masculinity, apart from Christ, is an empty pursuit. The goal is not to cultivate an arbitrary ideal of manhood but to grow in Christlikeness.

Christian men serve, lead, and love through the power ofChrist. Their Masculinity is not defined by dominance but by servanthood. They are called to reflect the self-sacrificial love of Christ in all areas of life, rejecting worldly measures of success in favor of spiritual faithfulness.

In the end, a Christian man is not defined by how well he fits into cultural molds but by his willingness to submit to Christ. Through Discipleship, he sheds the distortions of manhood shaped by the world—whether toxic bravado, passive irresponsibility, or an uncritical embrace of cultural norms. Instead, he becomes a man after God’s own heart, leading, serving, and loving as Christ did, standing firm in faith, and humbly guiding others towardGod’s eternal kingdom.